Lessons.

Hello 2016.

Third month into the new year and i've just only found time to blog (well, i'm supposed to be doing research for my assignment now but oh well). Soooo many things happened in the past few months i don't even know where to start or what to blog about. Let's see hmm...

Life's good, i guess. I can't say it's good like, awesome, but i guess over the years, i've learnt that life isn't perfect after all and all the ups and downs are what make life more interesting. Especially since i've had pretty bad life experiences before and i've been hurt deeply, i would say i'm appreciating life and people better now. The saying that, God will not give you something you can't handle can be applied to me and i believe God has the perfect plans for me in my life. Even though the past comes back to me and haunts me once in awhile now, but it has taught me more than just the pain i've been through. I'm not going to deny that my past is affecting me in both good and bad ways, but it has shaped me into the person i am now. I guess i love better right now, i've learned to appreciate people around me, be it my good friends or family. Yes, once in awhile i get emotional because the insecurities in me get to me and i get scared to trust people again. But because of that, i know who are the ones worth fighting for. To be honest, it's really tough fighting the demons in you especially when it keeps bringing you down. However, people around me have shown great love and care towards me despite my shortcomings, and these are the people i would fight my insecurities for. It's not easy, really, especially when you've been hurt so badly previously. But i'm trying my best. I'm giving my all to the ones i love and care for. It might not be much to them, but to me, it takes a great effort and courage to be able to push away my insecurities and to trust people again. I wouldn't say i'm doing a very good job in it, but slowly and surely, my past won't come back to me any more. One day, i'll stop waking up crying from nightmares and smile again, because the world is beautiful.